Classes for Women

[stlrtruck]

Summer Classes for Women at

THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED

By Sat., July 29, 2010

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL

OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1

Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat

Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.

Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM..

Class 2

Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours?

Round Table Discussion.

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3

Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?

--Group Debate.

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4

Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase

--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5

Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?

Examples on Video.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6

How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program.

Help Line Support and Support Groups.

Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7

Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?

Open Forum.

Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8

Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!

Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9

I Was Wrong and He Was Right!

--Real Life Testimonials.

Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10

How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.

Driving Simulations.

4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11

Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield.

Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12

How to Shop by Yourself.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Upon completion of ANY of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

[7SteelGal43]

Class 10
How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

[Galax Steeler]

That is good stuff.LOL

[HometownGal]

Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours?

LMAO!!!!

Funny shit!

Classes for Men


CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS.
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY JANUARY 25, 2011. NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays — Step by Step, with
Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours
beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll — Does It Change
Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of
Lifting The Seat and
Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? —
Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper
and The Floor —
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes — Can They Levitate and Fly
Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours
beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity — Losing The Remote To Your
Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support
Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00
PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things — Starting With
Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down
While Screaming.
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch — Bringing Her Flowers Is Not
Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00
PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost — Real
Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be
determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly
While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday’s noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live — Basic Differences Between
Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and
role-playing.
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be
determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing
Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy — Remembering Birthdays,
Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full
Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00
PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven — What It Is and How It Is
Used
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, locations to be
determine.

Upon completion of any of the above
courses, Diplomas will be issued to the
survivors.

[stlrtruck]

Sorry HTG but I'm not allowed to cook in my wife's kitchen! No ma'am, not at all. I only get to do the dishes. So I have eliminated class 5 and 14.

We have an automatic ice maker so class 1 is obsolete

I don't need to ask for directions, my wife tells me exactly how to get to where we are going so no need to stop and ask for directions either.

Class 6 - Losing the remote? Are you kidding me. My wife can definitely have the remote as long as the following conditions are met: 1) Steelers are not on TV 2) Penguins are not on TV 3) I'm not home

[Angina]

LOL!! And HTG, I just have to add:


Classes for men:


A Discussion of the Corollary Relationship Between the Local Humidity Index and Man Funk: The Daily Care and Cleaning of Your Man Parts


Also, there will be a physical therapy workshop in the gym following lunch. The therapists will be available to assist any man who is interested in working to get his fingers to curl around the handle of a toilet bowl brush. No reservations required.


(ok, see? this is why I should just lurk!)

[HometownGal]

LOL!! And HTG, I just have to add:


Classes for men:


A Discussion of the Corollary Relationship Between the Local Humidity Index and Man Funk: The Daily Care and Cleaning of Your Man Parts


Also, there will be a physical therapy workshop in the gym following lunch. The therapists will be available to assist any man who is interested in working to get his fingers to curl around the handle of a toilet bowl brush. No reservations required.


(ok, see? this is why I should just lurk!)

OMG - ROFLMAO!!!!

[stlrtruck]

LOL!! And HTG, I just have to add:


Classes for men:


A Discussion of the Corollary Relationship Between the Local Humidity Index and Man Funk: The Daily Care and Cleaning of Your Man Parts


Also, there will be a physical therapy workshop in the gym following lunch. The therapists will be available to assist any man who is interested in working to get his fingers to curl around the handle of a toilet bowl brush. No reservations required.


(ok, see? this is why I should just lurk!)

Ok now that was funny! REP POINTS for you.

[TatarMongol]

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things — Starting With
Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down
While Screaming.
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

I need 2 sign up 4 this. I suck at finding things even if they're right in front of me. Sometimes when it takes me all day 2 look 4 something but my wife finds it in 45 seconds. I don't know Y.

[Angina]

Ok now that was funny! REP POINTS for you.

Why thank ya kindly!

[SteelCityMom]

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things — Starting With
Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down
While Screaming.
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

I need 2 sign up 4 this. I suck at finding things even if they're right in front of me. Sometimes when it takes me all day 2 look 4 something but my wife finds it in 45 seconds. I don't know Y.

It's because we're always watching you.

My fiance has a severe problem with this as well...it's the one that made me laugh the hardest.