Guys Rule

Why Men Rule and a few chauvinist jokes thrown in:

Why should a man not reapair his woman's watch?
There's a clock on the stove.

Why are women's feet smaller than a man's?
To stand closer to the sink to do dishes and not get wet.

If a man has his wife at the front door and his dog at the back door, who should he let in first?
The Dog, it'll shut up once it's let in.

How should a man respond when his wife asks 'What's on the TV?'
Dust.

Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by men to be
opportunities to see if we can find the perfect present again!

Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be

One wallet, one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

Ideal 'Date Night' for a man?
His woman showing up naked with a six-pack of beer and a large Pizza.

Phone conversations last 30 seconds

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, they can still be your friend.

You can watch a game in silence for hours without your buddy thinking, "He must be mad at me."

If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might become lifelong buddies.

Wedding dress $5000; tux rental $100.

You don't have to clean your apartment if the maid is coming.

You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid

Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with "So, notice anything different?"

Great job man, lol!