LLT
10-20-2010, 04:24 AM
The Commish approached the podium in a lacy,frilly dress.
He said "I have some brand new rules...this league is just a mess.
We cant have people hitting hard, *(I learned this in pre-school).
and if you do, you must say 'sorry' this is my first new rule."
"Try to make contact in a way, so as not to cause offense.
If not, then just let them have the points, thats only common sense.
My second rule is a change to wearing pastel uniforms.
No more dark colors,(they seem so mean) are part of my reforms."
"Change #3 is that a team must understand that now...
players having social lives is something I wont allow.
After games, after practice and during the offseason.
Any player whos caught having fun, will be guilty of treason."
"The 4th change is about how many games we are to play next year.
I'm thinking 18 would be grand, or 30...It's still not clear.
Those players who oppose this change are wrong...they're rude and weird and sick.
If they tell me I am wrong...The Pats* get a draft pick"
"My last rule is that you surely must, respect my authority.
So please bow down to the golden idol that you see behind of me.
The resemblence to me is not by chance, at its base you see my name.
I'd put it in the HOF...but ...well...I've never played the game".
The commish then stepped out from behind the gilded podium.
He ignored the crowds emotional shouts of "Idiot" "Moron" and "Bum"
With fake tanned face and botoxed lips, he bowed to a crowd gone bad.
..and didnt notice his curtsy caused him to lose his maxi-pad.
So R.I.P. dear N.F.L. you're not what you once were.
Controlled aggression has been traded for rules that are demur.
So thank the man who feels the need to change what isnt broken.
"The commissioner is a clueless DICK"...not truer words are spoken.
-LLT
He said "I have some brand new rules...this league is just a mess.
We cant have people hitting hard, *(I learned this in pre-school).
and if you do, you must say 'sorry' this is my first new rule."
"Try to make contact in a way, so as not to cause offense.
If not, then just let them have the points, thats only common sense.
My second rule is a change to wearing pastel uniforms.
No more dark colors,(they seem so mean) are part of my reforms."
"Change #3 is that a team must understand that now...
players having social lives is something I wont allow.
After games, after practice and during the offseason.
Any player whos caught having fun, will be guilty of treason."
"The 4th change is about how many games we are to play next year.
I'm thinking 18 would be grand, or 30...It's still not clear.
Those players who oppose this change are wrong...they're rude and weird and sick.
If they tell me I am wrong...The Pats* get a draft pick"
"My last rule is that you surely must, respect my authority.
So please bow down to the golden idol that you see behind of me.
The resemblence to me is not by chance, at its base you see my name.
I'd put it in the HOF...but ...well...I've never played the game".
The commish then stepped out from behind the gilded podium.
He ignored the crowds emotional shouts of "Idiot" "Moron" and "Bum"
With fake tanned face and botoxed lips, he bowed to a crowd gone bad.
..and didnt notice his curtsy caused him to lose his maxi-pad.
So R.I.P. dear N.F.L. you're not what you once were.
Controlled aggression has been traded for rules that are demur.
So thank the man who feels the need to change what isnt broken.
"The commissioner is a clueless DICK"...not truer words are spoken.
-LLT