NJarhead
01-11-2013, 07:36 AM
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the Cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Fielding...He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Fielding every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Fielding. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Fielding."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well...I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his fucking wife."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Fielding...He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Fielding every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Fielding. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Fielding."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well...I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his fucking wife."